I have had a hard time writing about my experience in my journal. Writing about myself some how in my mind makes those things real forever. Writing it down makes me deal with biggest sources of shame to the forefront. Once I write it down, I must own it. Truly, I don’t think I want take stock on jet how out of control I was. I do need to sort it all up. So my mind started to weave a story for me. It is a way I can come to terms with aspects of my past in a less abrasive way. So I would think about the main character and I started to dream her. While there are some things in this story that are 100% me. There is a lot of friends and learning more about what it means to be bipolar. Also learning what manic looks like to others. So while I hope one day that a crap ton of people will find this story interesting and read it. I am hoping that writing this book will help me process my past and help me move forward with my life.